Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Holy Cow!!

I think I've overstayed my welcome in India. Today, my co-workers tried to kill me...not with a knife or gun...but with spicy food. I think it was their way of telling me to go home. They even laughed at me as I was gasped for air and reached for the water.

If only they could talk to the waitress at Thai Lao in San Antonio. Surely, she would tell them about the maximum level of spice that I've endured there. In general, I'm joking but I wonder what type of ulterior motives led to this type of cruel and unusual punishment. :)

Honestly though, my distaste for India hasn't gone un-noticed. My driver - who is probably the proudest Indian to ever live - seems disheartened by the fact that I've only taken pictures of the drive to work and back. So today, completely against my will he took me on a sightseeing tour of Bangalore (making me an hour late for work in the process). He showed me the parliament building, a palace, City Park and the planetarium. He also made it clear that we were continuing the tour tomorrow.

Communication with him is a challenge. Sadly, I understand my beloved Blanca more than Divakar. Keep in mind that Blanca speaks no English and I speak no Spanish. Divakar DOES speak English yet the conversation goes something like this:

Divakar - I take you for photos tomorrow.
Me - No, thank you. I need to get to work.
Divakar - Ok, I pick you up at 9:00 and we go to temple, palace and mosque.
Me - Oh, what the hell. It's just easier to agree.

So after spending a week here, I've figured out a few things about India.

1. Indians are very proud of their country. And when you stay in your 5 star hotel eating Italian food the whole time, they notice. Any they consider it their mission in life to introduce you to the culture, the food and the history that makes India truly remarkable.

2. The people here are some of the poorest in the world. Yet they do not feel sorry for themselves. They are happy with what they have and do not try to live outside their means (take note Americans). Even though I would compare India to border town Mexico only worse - they are proud of what they have. Proud of their culture, their heritage and their people. You know, it's really hard to feel sorry for someone who doesn't feel sorry for themselves.

3. Don't trust Indian's when it comes to food. If you do, make sure you have a paramedic nearby. Whoa Spicy!!!

Tomorrow night my co-workers have offered to take me to a steakhouse. WHAT?!?!? I'm not sure they realize that I'm from TEXAS - where we eat steaks for breakfast, lunch and dinner. Eating steak in India is like eating Mexican food in Canada - plus, I'm fairly sure cows are sacred here...so...I'm not feeling very confident about this decision.

4. If you're anything like Ross, then read this one twice. Please what ever you do, start being nice to your Indian call center reps. We've all called a 1-800 number and had an Indian voice on the other end of the line. This is usually about the time that Ross pulls out his "special cuss words". However, after working with an Indian call center I have to say - the agents who get cussed at all day by wealthy Americans are the lucky ones here. They're thankful for their jobs and they're trying their hardest. I don't agree with the offshore business model - but after seeing it first hand - I think we should treat all humans with a certain level of respect. I'm just sayin....

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